3 Months of Thankfulness

The day after Thanksgiving just happens to be the 3 month mark of my time in China. 3 months. Three. Months. What? Crazy. Anyways, it's the holiday season. Well, kind of. China does holidays and they do them very well but, in a not so surprising turn of events, they don't really do American holidays. Thanksgiving isn't really a thing here (turns out their not as attached to the history of America's beginnings as we are, which is probably why my students just stared at me when I started singing about turkeys and pilgrims), so it's not really the holiday season anywhere but in my heart and I'm really missing it - the decorations, the food, family, friends, everything. Thinking about all of the things that I would normally be doing this year has made me think more about my family and home than I usually do and it's making me more homesick than I normally am and that's making me grumpy. Without a peppermint mocha to warm my heart and brighten my soul, I find myself grumbling a lot more often about China. my job and being away from home. Which, actually, goes against everything that the holiday season represents. So, even though I can't really have a Thanksgiving this year I am attempting to keep the Thanksgiving spirit alive in my heart (besides making my students sing along with me about turkeys and pilgrims), by focusing on all of the things that being here for the past three months has made me thankful for. And, since I can't sit around a Thanksgiving feast and talk about all the things I am thankful for, I have decided to do it here.

Food:

I am thankful for yotza and applepears (they're the deliciousness of a pear with the crunchiness of an apple and they're my favorite). I am thankful that my favorite cookies can be found in almost all 14 convenience stores on my route to school. I am thankful for chili bread, rice, jiaozi, baozi, lotus root and all of the other delicious things that I get to eat! I am also thankful for the little tastes of home (like peanut butter and ketchup) that I don't get to have very often but when I do are so, so good! I am thankful that I have delicious Chinese food to eat and delicious American food to miss.

Friends:

It took me awhile to realize that because of language and cultural barriers, friendship looks different here but now that I see it, I am beyond thankful for it. Here, it looks like sitting around a table for an hour on Saturday mornings, helping them with their English. It's playing badminton until you feel like your arm is going to fall off and then sharing a plate of fried pig intestines. It's asking questions about life here and answering questions about life in America. It's spending the weekend playing sports that you have never played before, wearing matching uniforms, cheering in Chinese while they cheer in English and not getting yelled at when you mess up the competition that they have practiced so hard for. I am so thankful for the friends that I have made here. The ones that have asked me about homesickness, have helped me figure out how to live here, have taken me into their homes and their lives without even hesitating. I am also thankful for the friends who went out of their way to make me a part of a team (even though I didn't really want to be a part of the team) who stepped out of their comfort zones, using English, letting me join in, and even cheering me on though I (ABSOLUTELY) did not deserve it. I am thankful for the friends that I only see for an hour a week. I am thankful for the conversation and the questions and the time that they willingly spend with me, even though it is so short. I am thankful for all of them and the way that they make Lin'an feel less like a work placement and more like a life.

Family:

I love China. I love it. I love being here. It is easy for me to be thankful of the things around me because I love them. But, I wouldn't be able to be thankful for these things if I wasn't here and, without my family at home, I definitely wouldn't be here. Also, without a family like the one I have, I wouldn't know to appreciate and be thankful for the people who have taken me in out here. The people out here have helped me to understand the things that I have seen my family do a thousand times for other people but I never really understood why, or how important it was, until I needed someone to do those things for me. Basically, if China has taught me anything, it has taught me just how blessed I am by the family I have been given (I would like to clarify that I did know this before I left but China has just taken my appreciation to new heights). Unfortunately, I am learning this new appreciation just as Im having to decide what I will be doing next year. And, as hard as it is, I'm incredibly grateful that the decision is so difficult because my family is so wonderful.

China:

These past three months have seen some of the best and the worst times. There have been days that I wake up thinking I will never, ever leave China and then five minutes later I'm begging for a one way ticket back to the States. They have pushed me way out of my comfort zone and negated every descriptive word I have ever assigned to myself. And, as annoying as it was to be stretched and tested, I have learned a lot and I am thankful for that. (For example, buses are big and they will come realllll close but they always swerve just in time, so there is no need to jump, scream and run. (If you do jump, scream and run everyone will laugh at you and call you a foreigner...which isn't a terrible way to live but it's much less embarrassing to just walk "confidently" in front of the bus while praying that it will swerve just in time.))

I am also thankful for the progress that I have seen not only in my self as a teacher but also in my students. In their English abilities, they have gone from saying "teacher, ummmmm no." to saying "teacher. no. don't pick me. i don't know. so tired. pick jimmy." In their everyday lives, the kids who started the year with toothless grins, now have their teeth. Kids who started the year with baby smiles, now have toothless grins. (I am also extrememly thankful that no one has lost any teeth while in my class...ew.) Our friendship has also grown. At the beginning of the year, they were more cautious. They jumped up and down screaming my name, but from a distance. Now, I don't even see them coming before they tackle me. (I'm still not totally sure how thankful I am for this kind of progress.) They (now) shower me with hugs and candy and (still) scream every English word that they can think of (but now it's in full sentences instead of just a list!). I am so thankful for my students, the progress that I have seen in them and the relationships that I have with them. They are sweet and good and crazy and loud. They are the reason for some of my worst moments but they are also a huge part of my best ones and it is going to be real hard to say goodbye.(Sometimes, right before I start class, I think about how much time we have left and how these next few months are only going to make it that much harder to say goodbye to them. Then I hear "teacher. louis! mouth water! on my desk! gamaaaa (what the heck)!" and then I think "yes, it will be hard to say goodbye to them in june...if i make it that long.")

I am thankful for the mountains that provide beautiful scenery everywhere you turn (and for the amazing shape that my muscles will be in after a year of riding my bike up them). I am thankful for the Chinese language, the little bit that I know and ever increasing amount that I am learning. I am thankful for the chances that I have to travel while I am out here and the people that are willing to go with me. I am thankful for the way that living in another culture has helped me to think about the world (and the sociology of it all...because it's so cool!) I am thankful for the internet that keeps me in touch with everyone in America and up to date about what's going on to the world. But I am most thankful for the feeling of safety that I have here and the fact that, even though I am not in America, during this time of holiday joy, missing my family and my favorite food and activities, I am safe and (relatively) warm and loved. And, especially right now, that is more than enough.